.:] At the Movies [:.

It was horrible. Three incredible movies in a row and now I can't seem to recover...

Went on a movie marathon with devon (I honestly can't think of a nickname) and belcanto. To be honest twas awesome. So awesome we continued the evening joining belcanto at the bars with her friends...

but onto the movies:

Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind: I could go on and on about this movie. I got to an interesting interview with Charlie Kaufman with Charlie Rose the day before. Also annapan had an insightful entry: Check out "I want brain damage." It was pointed out to me how it was filmed in the way that memory works. The loss of detail. The brain mapping is and interesting part of memory I 've been fascinated with as of late - esp. since I've been trying to be more aware of my brain process. I was kinda distracted thinking if I want brain damage or not myself SO I NEED to see this again very soon.

Big Fish- Wow. I so needed to see this. I'm discovering my life is going really well however, I've very dissatisfied with my relationship with my father. This movie really kinda captured the situation and a fear I have that one of us is going to die without resolving anything. The movie is incredibly entertaining and Ewan is dreamy. I gotta see this again.

City of God - I don't know if I'm ready to write about this. I seriously suffered some crazy physical stress watching this movie. I will probably never watch this movie again. However, it will stay with me for the rest of my life. Kinda like the way American Me did. I'm disgusted with certain events in the movies but I understand that it is the nasty real part of life.

I left the theatre feeling really kinda sickened and depressed despite the AMAZING movies, the great time, and the good friends. Luckily, I think after talking about the shows with devon and belcanto I slowly came to the realization I've had this cloud of dread looming over my head.

Clementine: This is it Joel. It's going to be gone soon.
Joel: I know.
Clementine: What do we do?
Joel: Enjoy it.

I'm just going to try to enjoy it. All of it. The stress. The dread. The happiness. The success. The enjoyment.

.:] City of God [:.

GO see it. NOW. Just don't have a chicken dinner before hand. Then get back to me...

.:] Biking Chicago [:.

These last few late nights I've been biking well after midnite. Its a strangely liberating feeling being able to coast the streets and sidewalks at will. I guess I've become a little less gun shy to getting into an accident. I've my awesome headlights, helmet, flashing armband and my new bike safety skills to help me feel safer. I can't wait to join a Critical Mass or the LATE Nite Ride in July. I'd been looking forward to it every year but for some reason or another I didn't do it. I am soooo glad I got that bike.

.:] What's so attractive about... [:.

my ass that makes moving vehicles feel the need to aim themselves at it?

On my way to work this morning, my rear tire got clipped by a car as I was going through the intersection. The very first morning I take my new bike out onto the street and the bloody rear tire frame is out of wack. I went ahead and rode it to work. I remembered a bike shop on the way home on North Ave. Name escapes me for the moment. The guy who ended up salvaging my rim was a saint and devil in disguise. He'd informed me that if only I took the time to take down the license plate he woulda bashed in the windowsheild. Yuppers I'm going back there. Another bonus - they had a free sample that had Gavin McGraw, Rachel Yamagata, Crystal Method, and Stereophonics.

.:] 4teen [:.

We once stood behind a couple of girls that were on what must have been their monthly visit to the grocery store. Giggling, they gingerly put the plastic bar behind all their purchases placed on the conveyer belt. He put down the box of condoms and put another plastic bar behind it.

He was awesome like that. I knew he was embarrassed while I thought it frickin' funny. We were so different. I knew dating me was pushing his envelope so it wasn't horribly surprising that it had to end. But for some reason it hurt the most. Looking back, probably the most understanding and patient person I've ever met.

The Soggy Bottom Boys - Man of Constant Sorrow

(In constant sorrow through his days )
I am a man of constant sorrow
I've seen trouble all my day.
I bid farewell to old Kentucky
The place where I was born and raised.
(The place where he was born and raised )
For six long years I've been in trouble
No pleasures here on earth I found
For in this world I'm bound to ramble
I have no friends to help me now.

He has no friends to help him now
It's fare thee well my old lover
I never expect to see you again
For I'm bound to ride that northern railroad
Perhaps I'll die upon this train.

Perhaps he'll die upon this train.
You can bury me in some deep valley
For many years where I may lay
Then you may learn to love another
While I am sleeping in my grave.

While he is sleeping in his grave.
Maybe your friends think I'm just a stranger
My face you'll never see no more.
But there is one promise that is given
I'll meet you on God's golden shore.
He'll meet you on God's golden shore

.:] Moment of Silence [:.

The 96' Chevy S10 I've been driving around for the last month is dead. who am I kiddin'. Its been alot of trouble in the last few weeks. Getting it towed. Getting rear ended.....

Went out to karaoke, meet up friends and reunite with one of my bartenders. Right before I bloody get there. Nothing. The truck just stopped moving. Luckily I had Devon on the phone as it was happening. He came out of the bar in time to push me in a parking spot that miraculously appeared. Another couple was crossing the street as we were trying to maneuver the car into place. They helped push the car and then said they had to do the same thing the week before. Um, I'm so the proponent of good karma.

Also my good luck that Tom Walsh showed up last night. Tom Walsh knows the best mechanics, or so I have been told. Well, this morning they picked up the truck and then called a few hours later to tell me that the engine is completely dead. He wanted to know what I did to it.

I honestly tried to take care of that thing. But everytime I'd pointed out that the "Service Engine Soon" light came on, I would tell my Pops, who then would just blow it off. So this time, I was thinking I would take care of it myself, sent it to the mechanics, and fix whatever was wrong with the engine. ('cause I do know a little bit about cars). So I guess I saved my self a lot of cash and trouble. AND its a real good thing that I bought that bike, I'm through with tech week, and the weather is loads better! *knock on wood*

.:] Number Five [:.

We would play video games and watch anime all hours of the day.
"You keep chasing. You'll lose that way," he'd tell me as we'd play Mortal Kombat. Soon after that, "Finish Her!!," a quick flurry of pressed buttons, and he'd be right. Again.

A shake of a tin of fruit drops and I'd be all smiles again. He would play me Shonen Knife in the car when we'd drive into town to get new manga.

Then he'd left me for Japan. When he returned, everything was different. The song sounded different. He left me. Outside.

Shonen Knife - Music Square

I am very happy tonight
We could be here today
I was waiting for a long time
To come to music square
When you sing the song that i love
I can't stop the beating of my heart
I don't know why

I am very happy tonight
I could be close to you
I was waiting for a long time
To come to music square

Every song i will give to you
I want you to have a merry day

I am very happy tonight
I could see the beautiful stars
I've been waiting for a long time
To come on music square

When you gently play your guitar
I can't stop the beating of my heart
I don't know why

I am very happy tonight
We could be here today
I was waiting for a long time
To come to music square

I don't know how it's going to end
But i hope that we can meet again

I am very happy tonight
I could be close to you
I was waiting for a long time
To come to music square

So come on music square.

.:] Bunny Quiz [:.

congratulations. you are the kiss my ass happy
bunny. You don't care about anyone or anything.
You must be so proud


which happy bunny are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

.:] Sometimes I Wonder [:.

House Of Love - I Don't Know Why I Love You

I don't know why I love you
Your face is a hammer in my head
I remember every word you said
I just don't know why I love you
I don't know why I care
I never even liked your hair
I feel like a seven heir
But I don't know why I love you

Television turns me on
When the summer's hot
And the spirit's thrown
How can I get close to you
When you got no mercy
No, you got no mercy
No you got no...
I don't know why I love you

Your face is a foreign food
I really don't know if I should
I just don't know why I love you
I don't know why I care
I duck and I weave and I fight
I work just to treat you right
God, I don't know why I love you
Ha, ha, ha
I don't know why I love you
It might be your soul and your heart Maybe it's the way that you speak
I don't why I love you

Television turns me on
When the summer's hot
And the spirit's thrown
So, how can I get close to you
When you got no mercy
No, you got no mercy
No you got no...
I don't know why I love you
I don't know why I care
I don't know why I love you
I don't know why I love you
I don't know why I love you
I don't know why I love you
And I don't know why I care

.:] Jesus Freaks [:.

Ok, you Passion phreeks... you know who you are... don't ever let it come to this! Spread the Good Word.

.:] Of Love and Other Demons [:.

This summary is not available. Please click here to view the post.

.:] A Good Kind Of Tired [:.

I'm exhausted.

And its cause I had a full day and just when I so just want to NOT go into rehearsal tonight I'm glad I did. Working on the choreography tonight had me really analyze my character with in the dance solo. Since the character is s'posed to go through a change within the dance, I get to pace or place the beats of the transformation in the dance. So I was given the choreography and the form and song which to follow but I get to make choices and choreograph and manipulate that dance. It was/is hard and I LOVE it. There's a lesson in there somewhere but I'm going to sleep on it.

.:] Not Too Hot [:.

I'm feeling rather cold really. Nothing to do with the weather really either. I'm getting down on myself after some disappointing news.

Its interesting this talent I have for being wacky and cheering people on and making people laugh. et most of the time I can't do that for myself. I'm sure I've oodles of silver linings to be found in this fog as of late yet... I'm still in a bit of a fog.

First, after tonight's rehearsal, I think its actually sinking in that I'm learning a solo for a performance that's going up in less than two weeks. I'm doing really well considering I just learned it last night. I'll be outstanding I'm sure. I just need to get it drilled in with the music... Its been a hassle having the rehearsals cutting into my work schedule but I'm getting another kind of payoff, I think.

I've been really turned off of Lindy this past month. Awful that it comes after an inspirational workshop. Alas, the disappointment of Black and Tan among other things, I dunno, just don't get me dancing anymore. Annimal and da Unicorn will be at Fizz this week. Those two will atleast get me out on the floor. I'm lucky that Floss! has been working my creative juices.

And then work. The Front Desk staff has been reduced. I, for example, have one day a week. HOWEVER, my boss has mentioned that this is also because he wants to put me on a new promotions team. Something something about making sure my salary reflects that. I wasn't paying attention b/c I'd noticed that some *morons* were kept on front desk schedule and not me. What does that say about my way of thinking? A new prospect comes along and I'm still looking behind me....

Ok I'm done with the Negative Nancy routine. If'n y'all wanna check out the American Girl kickin' it Beboian Style, I'll open the can o' whoop ass every Saturday night at the Cornservatory starting the 27th of March.

.:] Tessa Fall Down [:.

Well, I had this enormous entry on my LJ but seemed to have lost it. So I will tell the story here. Instead. And have me a pint of Guinness to celebrate St. Pat's. Too.

If I hadn't mentioned it before, snowboarding has, for a long amount of time, been on my list of 25 Things to Experience Before I Die. Here I was one morning, in Jackson Hole almost convincing myself I really didn't want to. Then the Infamous Dyers interjected and I ended up getting me all signed up in Level One classes.

Trust me when I tell you I looked FANTABULOUS in my snow gear. I did not look as faboo skating around on my board trying to figure out if I am goofy or normal (in snowboard terms smartass). I finally settled on normal and my snowboard instructors heaved us up onto the ski lift after our first hour of instruction.

Twas a fabulous sight! If ever you get a chance to visit Jackson Hole, even if you aren't the snow sport type, you will so appreciate the beauty of the mountain. This is what I did while riding up, by myself. Well, that and watching an instructor carve into the snow and shouting up the mountain, ".. its that easy." True to his word, a small boy carved a path right towards his teacher a stopped perfectly next to him.

Soon I realized that the lift had slowed down and that my instructor was standing to the side of the exit ramp helping people off the chairs. I made sure the normal (left) nose of my board was pointing out and I shifted my weight to push myself off the back of the chair. My teacher hooked his arm in the crook of my left arm and skated me down the ramp. Easy Peasy. I was clear. Didn't have my head bashed in like the instructors had warned us would happen if we didn't move quick enough forward.

My teacher asked if I was ok. I said yes and he let go. I attempted to skate my way down the slope towards my other classmates when I felt my right foot slip off the board. I looked to see my foot try to place itself on the board. But this time I watched my foot slip right off behind. I tried to stop myself with that foot. and I did for moment before I had the board sliding itself back up the slope. Its somewhere around this point that I fell forward. Then I heard something. A pop. A crack. I did not have the time or wit to decipher it because suddenly there was this burning BURNING pain in my knee. Then I started screaming.

All I could think about was my sister's history with her ACL. In fact she had surgery (again) on Monday to reconstruct it. I calmed down enough to roll myself over and keep my leg straight. My instructor was there right away and unstrapped my boot from the board. He asked how I was doing and told me the ski patrol was on the way.

As I waited, I radioed over to my Morley Manor housemates: "You know how I said I was going up the lift? I fell down. And the ski patrol is going to come and get me." Without fail, someone radioed back,"Is he cute?", right before a pleasant face loomed over me asking how I was doing....

more later...

I'm icing my knee at the moment. Rehearsals have aggravated the knee again. Besides, Ty Ty the HOT Medical guy is in the next section.. I don't see the point of continuing this story without illustrations...

.:] I'm doing fine... [:.

and that's ok. No, it's really better than ok. It's been pretty awesome this month and I'm trying to reassure myself that...it's ok. More later.

.:] eh? [:.

I dunno.

Dunno why I'm up. Got to sleep VERY learly this morning and I'm pretty much awake. Any ideas?

Dunno if I'm just going to switch entirely to LJ. I've been done with the new template but won't put it up b/c it looks stupid with the Blogspot ad. They aren't allowing upgrades yet so I haven't haven't figured out another way to move that damn ad. Any ideas?

Dunno if I can move right away. I could but now I find out at work that they're going to cut the staff down SO I might not even have a job. I sincerely want to believe that they will NOT let The Bunny go, however, not going to count chickens a'fore they are hatched. Ok, so that one I just kinda have to ride out ad be on my best behaviour.

Dunno if I should try to get a roommate. I know of alot of folks that are looking for an apt. I even know a few super cool leads looking for a place to live when they finally move to Chicago. I've been doing my search on the assumption that my living space will be used for massage/work space as well. I think it be rude for me to keep bringing in clients and having to ask for the space and privacy. So any ideas?

Dunno if I should just go ahead and go to the gym early and work out before kickboxing class. It be better than going in the class, cold, off the street. Besides since Jackson Hole, I've been slackin' cause of injury. I gotta get back on the horse. I'm thinking I may have to kinda sleep on it.

What I know for sure. Kickboxing. Orange. Sushi Wabi. Kate Time. Kim Time. Kitty Time. Floss! Studio X.

.:] Sewiously [:.

For all my bitching about being home, this last hour has been the pinnacle. I'm getting out of here. I know its kinda foolish to think that I should just move out on my own with out my income *still* not stablized but I have to wonder how much of my life would be so much more normal if I didn't HATE where I am right now? Shit, I mean how lame is it that I can understand that they are talking about me. One, b/c they are STILL that loud and two, I CAN understand part of the language. duh.

Ack I have to so much more to write but I seriously can't sit here and attempt to keep typing..... and I have to take a piss but CAN'T b/c the BLOODY FRIGGIN TOILET is GONE!!!

.:] No really, I hate being a bitch [:.

Watch out... Bitch session... And its may not make a lot of sense so lets' see if I can keep it to 5 sentences.

1. Pops is changing the toilet for an embarrassingly stupid reason, taking up the bathroom floor while he's at it.

2. I *cannot* bear the smell of Filipino cooking in this house... Yes, CC this makes *no* sense.

3. I really really have stuff to write and get done on the computer today but all this noise and smell is driving me mad.

4. I've ear plugs and the CD player on HIGH. Again. Ignoring my Pops invitation to lunch on what ever that is.

5. I'm being the American Girl that I don't want to be.

Not to give away my character in the new show, but I am making choices that are so apart from the way I act at home.. Its kinda weird. I'm losing sense of what I really think of other cultures. Yeah, generally I'm pretty open minded and very curious and polite to people from other cultures. But at home I'm a complete rude bitch. Not completely sure why.

It was a big part of the session with my therapist yesterday. However, it was getting to be very apparent that I was getting way agitated at even the prospect of having a conversation with my Pops that we put a pin in it.

.:] Robot Stories the Review [:.

Normally I woulda just let this go. In fact, I'd missed the viewing on Sunday b/c I was stuck in the Burbs. But I went tonight. Primarily b/c "Greg Pak" posted in my comments. So I didn't let it go...

Robot Stories had two strikes against it as I entered Facets tonight. One, I tend to get hyper-critical of Asian American work, particularly film. Either I really really like it or I think its pretty insipid. Two, I'd read the review of the film in the Reader this week. That review pretty much ripped it up. But I figured, hey, I wasn't really up for dancing and I certainly didn't want to walk into a potential karaoke fest at home.

For one thing, I would want EVERYONE to see is the animation in the beginning credits. I've been concerned lately that my scientific and geek intellect isn't up to snuff. But I got it! I got the joke! (and several techie/geek references throughout *pat on back*)

Then the movie started and it was disappointing, at the beginning. The first story kinda lost me. The relationships weren't engaging. Period. Then after the robot baby was presented all I could think of was South Park's Stan's Canadian lil brother.

Second story.. Interesting.. Very nostalgic... To my childhood (having SERIOUS Battle of the Planets flashbacks) as well as my relationship with my mother. And I really dug the 70's snapshot filter used on the flashbacks. If there's one thing I'm taking away from that story, it is this: I'm cleaning up my room. *yawn* But tomorrow. But before I cross any streets.

Third: I really enjoyed this one. Much more to the characters and better cast. Reminded me of my last boyfriend for some reason. hmmmm... OK, I really want one of you screenwriters to see this scene and tell me if the improvement in the writing or what in this one. From this one: I want to make servo sounds ALL the time.

Fourth: I really really liked this one. All the connections were clear and drove the idea and the plot. Excellent cast 'cept for the son.. I wanted to kinda shoot him. Not dead, but enough to get him to shut up. This story is the one I want to see as an entire film. I really would like to see this concept and storyline really fleshed out.

Then again... I am thinking of how A.I. and Matrix saturated themselves in the dialogue of humanity and technology. I didn't care for them as much. I like Animatrix more, for instance. Easier little concept caplets for me to swallow perhaps? Or more efficient stories that get you think of the possibilities and not of the special effects....

I dunno. Someone watch this and let me know if I'm being hypercritical or what... and I want to talk more about it without worrying about teasers! Its Still playing in NYC and Chicago and opens LA next week. Oh, and stay til the end of the credits!!! ;)

.:] LMAO [:.

This tdj guy cracks ma shitup. Inspired by this worth1000.com contest: Far Side cartoons made real! he made his own...

Is it creepy to list someone on your friends list when you never ever met them but are tired of filtering through your friend's friend list just so you can read his brilliantly funny brain at work?

.:] Jeezy Creezy Bloopers [:.

Found a blurb about this article concerning the blooper reel of Gibson's film about Jeezy Creezy on CC's blog. This one's my favorite...


The Last Supper. Jesus is in the upper room with his disciples. Judas (Luca Lionello) is seated nearby.

Jesus: If the world hate you, ye know that it hated me before it hated you. If ye were of the world, the world would love his own: but because ye are not of the world, but I have chosen you out of the world, therefore the world – ah, Christ.

Judas: Hateth you.

Jesus: Who’s on first, right?

Judas: [laughs]

Jesus: [rolls eyes at camera] John could write gospel, but, you know, could he write dialogue?

Off Camera: [laughter] Cut!

.:] My Boy(s) [:.

Funny. I was just starting this entry when Rocco, my boy, calls. This after MONTHS of phone tag. I was going to say how much I miss my boys. Not boyfriends, not lovers. My Boys.

Boys that are my weekend boyfriends. Boys that I can talk to about anything. Boys that will give me loverly little kisses. Boys that will stay on the phone with me late late into the night. Boys that we tell me stories where I am the heroine and they are the hero. Boys that will tell me about the evil girls that broke their hearts. Boys that will let me tell them they are dorks for dumping that perfectly lovely girl. Boys that will gossip with me as we dance. Boys that will tell me what a catch I am... but won't try to put "the make" on me.

So finally I get to talk to dear dear Rocco. A shame that a part of our brief conversation is about how his new gf wasn't too keen on him talking to me. I mean its ME. I'm harmless...but I know what she might have been thinking. Its kinda weird to hear a story of how two people can be so close but never ever have actually met in person. Kinda weird. Sorta. But he talked to her about how considers me a good friend and wants to keep talking to me, so she understood. Unfortunately, he works so much and was so tired so it was a very brief talk. all the same... I miss him and the rest of my boys. {Gotta go... IMing with The Unicorn ;))

.:] Robot Stories [:.

Who wants to go with me? Come on you geeks! Its got Robots! Its got Love!

Its a movie I'd heard about on Fresh Air on NPR just now. I've met Greg Pak in my Asian American Student Politics Past. Now that's one AA director I respect, M. Night, not so much.

I'm thinking I'll be free on Sunday...

.:] American Girl [:.

I'm the next best thing to Margaret Cho in a sitcom. I'm the American Girl in Floss! I GOT IT! I GOT IN!! That was a good thing that happened early on in JH. I got a call asking me to join despite missing out on rehearsals...

I went ahead and went to rehearsal despite my face. The swelling had gone down considerably and not noticable with my glasses on. Man what fun. I can't wait till I stop bein' so fuckin' sore and shit. I can't wait to practice with MK and Deevon. I can't wait to perform again!

.:] Getting There [:.

First of all I slept over at Kim and Tom's 'cause, truth be told, they were afraid I'd oversleep my flight. While I was there I gave my first massage of the trip, then we were all tired so off to sleep. Alas, I was like child on Christmas Eve I really couldn't sleep well. Though I did have a very vivid dream about my kickboxing class, which I rocked earlier in the day. It also helps that my instructor is a great motivator and adorable.

Finally, Kim and I are up and finalizing our packing while Tom is picking up Loupy. Hell, let's get to the big surprise. We had so much crap between the four of us, the Beeyatchski's ordered up a bigger ride. Loupy so graciously provided the morning Mimosa and I was loopy myself before we checking the Massues-a-phone. But we did curbside check in and met up with our other Chicago friends making the flight with us.

Though most of us sat separately through the plane it was nice to know we all were making the trip together. That and I got to sit next to a geeky lil snowboarder. Generally I've never flown with others exception being my family and anne-girl, so it was kinda weird recognizing ppl on my flight.

I spent a good chunk of time watching the landscape and the cloudscape. When we started the descent - it was breathtaking. We got to walk across the tarmac which just made the view of the mountains even more " majestic." I cant' find any other pictures from the others but I'll link them at a later time.

Then in the airport I'd felt I was waiting a little too long for my baby to get unloaded. I don't think I'd ever felt some much POSSESSION OBSESSION over anything that I'd ever owned. I was feeling really frustrated that my table wasn't showing up after everyone had gotten their ski gear. But good news, the massues-a-phone showed up and was loaded onto our transport breaking a window! More great views along the way... then we got to Morley Manor!

We nine, ran around the house exploring and screaming out our finds. Our rooms, hidden passageways, the sauna, the hot tub, the kitchen, ALL THIS STUFF! T'was awesome....

more later...

.:] Something New [:.

Right so I guess this would be a good time to update ALOT of stuff. I am home for the day and not cause I want to.... Here's the something new. I really really REALLY want to go to work today. But I had to call in b/c one side of my face is swollen AND bruised and I have a cut on the bridge of my nose. All this happened b/c I've joined a fight club...no, more like I accidentally pulled my clock radio onto my nose early this morning. I, again was dreaming of snowboarding, when BAM! suddenly I was with my hand to my nose. I was super sleepy b/c I took some Tylenol PM so I barely realized I was awake and my nose was bleeding. I got myself up and cleaned off. Grabbed a bag of frozen veggies for my face, set my pillows to raise my head about my heart lever and went right back to sleep.

I look like crap and I know I'd be worthless standing around with my ugly mug. I even have the broken nose bump on my nose. I'm going to take my MODs suggestion and have it looked at this afternoon. It'd be a dirty shame to lose all my adorableness with a boxer's bump on my nose.